Sex Ed 101: Lubricants

It's Back to School Time!  Even if you don't have children heading off to school,  there's something about September 1st that leaves you longing for some extra knowledge about something, anything!

There's nothing like the first day of school when you start the year eager to learn, with your clean notebook and freshly sharpened pencil.  By December, you're over it.  Right now though, inspired by all the back to school specials in stores, we wanted to give you a quick overview on sex education, starting with Lube 101.

Fantasy Gifts believes that lubricant is an essential ingredient for any sexual encounter.  Whether you are alone, or with a partner, a satisfying, healthy sexual experience must include lubricant.  But which one and why?

The first factor to consider is why are you using a lubricant?  Believe it or not, different lubricants can enhance or diminish a sexual experience.  Are you using it alone or with a partner?  If you are using it alone, are you using it with a toy or without a toy?  Why does it matter?  Because if you are using a silicone toy or a latex condom, you must not use a silicone based lubricant, like Pjur Eros Original Bodyglide, because it will break down the silicone material.  This is not only bad for your silicone based sex toy but can be downright dangerous when you're talking about a latex condom.  Try a water-based lubricant like System Jo H2O Personal Lubricant.  This high-quality, water based lubricant reactivates when you add more moisture to it so it will never become dry and tacky.

The second factor to consider is your own body.  What sensitivities does your own body have?  If you are prone to yeast infections, we do not recommend using a flavored lubricant.   While flavored lubricants cannot cause a yeast infection, the sorbitol which provides the flavoring can feed an already existing yeast infection.  If you are looking for a different sensation without the sorbitol, try a warming or cooling water based lubricant like Wet Synergy.

If you prefer a product that is made with only natural or organic ingredients, try System JO Organic Lubricant.  This lubricant is 100% natural certified USDA organic.  It is made with aloe vera and acai making it silky smooth and long lasting.  It is condom and silicone toy compatible.  Best of all, it is glycerin and paraben free.

The third factor to consider is what experience are you hoping to enhance?  If you anticipate oral sex (and do not have a yeast infection as discussed above) then we love the flavors of System JO H2O Flavored Lubricants.  Available in vanilla, mint, tangerine, apple, strawberry, cherry, raspberry, and pomegranate, there's a flavor for every taste!  If you want to warm it up or cool it down, we like the Wet Synergy mentioned above.  If you are going for anal play, you must have an anal based lubricant.  The viscosity is thicker, making it perfect to protect the anus which does not produce its own moisture.  Our favorite is System JO Anal H2O Personal Lubricant.

Whatever your desired outcome, a lubricant will enhance it!

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Mothers Need Romance Too!

Listen up guys!  Sunday is Mother's Day!  While the day is traditionally devoted to the woman who gave you life, let's think for a moment about the woman who gave your children life.  After all, before she became a mother, she was your lover.  

Do you remember what your life was like before you had children?  When sex was a spontaneous act that didn't require as much scheduling as a White House briefing?  When the only reason you were too tired to have sex was because you were tired from having so much sex?  BC (before children) you could have morning sex, afternoon sex, late night sex.  You could have sex in the bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, the laundry room.  You could use loud sex toys, watch porn in the living room and moan as loud as you want to.  

Children certainly change everything.  But don't despair, you can still recapture romance without shipping your kids off to the babysitter.  First thing, set the mood.  We've all heard foreplay begins at breakfast.  So on Sunday morning, start off with breakfast in bed.  Bring in her favorite breakfast on a nice tray.  A flower from the backyard would be a nice touch.  And don't forget the card!  Most women deem a card more important than an actual gift.  Let her know that today is all about her.  

After the kids go to bed, the real celebration can begin.  First, set the stage.  Arrange the room with scented candles and strew the bed with rose petals.  Try our game Rose Petal Seductions which not only sets the stage, but also sets a fun, playful mood - perfect for romance!

Then give her a sensual massage.  Don't know how to give one?  Sinclair makes a great DVD entitled The Joy of Erotic Massage.  This DVD features real couples explicitly demonstrating both massage techniques and advanced methods to relax, arouse and satisfy!  Don't forget the massage oil.  We like Kama Sutra's Massage Oil in sweet almond or use an unscented massage oil.  Some candles turn into heated massage oils, like the Tantric Soy Massage Candle.  This luxurious massage candle melts into a silky, nourishing oil that will glide over skin as it fills the room with a warm, sexy scent.   

Next it's movie and a toy time!  Pop in a couple-friendly movie, like Digital Playground's Pirates Collector's Edition.  It's the movie everyone talks about and is the biggest epic in the history of adult films.  It has a story line and a touch of humor - perfect for both of you.  Follow up with a high quality, couples toy.  Our best-seller is the We Vibe 4. 

This is one remote you won't have to fight over!  Worn while making love, the We-Vibe 4 boasts more power, a fully waterproof design, a convenient wireless remote control, and a wireless charger base.  Best of all, it's whisper-quiet and super powerful.  By the time the evening ends, you'll remember why you got together in the first place and you'll recapture the romance of life before children.  Best of all,she'll owe you for Father's Day in June too!

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April "Sex" in the Showers

April Showers are starting to fall.  All that rain automatically makes us think of Sportsheets Sex in the Shower - a great line of sex toy products specifically devoted to, what else, Sex in the Shower!  In order to encourage you to try Sex in the Shower, Fantasy Gifts is offering 25% off the entire line for the month of April.

Finally couples have more to rely on than the erratic placement of the soap dish, the unsteadiness of the faucet and the random height of the shower head to achieve sexual satisfaction in the tub or shower.  This product line has thought of everything.  The Dual Shower Head ensures neither you nor your partner will ever get cold.   It connects to your shower as a single unit but branches out into two individual heads.  The heads work as one unit, but there are four water-pressure options to choose from: both heads using a full-body spray; both in a pulsating massage; one full-body spray and one pulsating massage; or both heads giving a full-body spray with the pulsing massage jets in the center.

The Single Locking Suction Handle  is made of thick white plastic and suctions easily to most smooth surfaces, including glass, fiberglass, and tiles that are at least four inches across. When you’ve suctioned the handle to the shower wall, simply click the locking handle shut (you’ll hear it click) and you’re good to go.

The Dual Locking Suction Handle locks securely in place with two heavy-duty suction cups. They’ll stick to any smooth surface (glass, tiles over four inches wide, fiberglass, etc.), and once you’ve pressed them into place, you simply push down the levers on each end and they’ll stay there for as long as you want them to. To remove, just lift the levers and pull the cups up with the tiny rubber tabs sticking out at the sides.

TheSingle Locking Foot Rest  allows you to achieve previously impossible positions in your bath or shower. With its strong lever-activated suction cup and smooth waterproof design, you can have extra leverage, extra height and extra sensations within seconds.

For a stronger bond, try the Suction Handcuffs  The line also features Vibrating Sponge and a Vibrating Mesh Sponge. Remember, 25% off all Sex in the Shower products for the month of April, in-store at our Marlton and Turnersville, New Jersey locations and online at www.fantasygiftsnj.com.

Shower Sex and water play are a great way to be intimate and get clean at the same time!  Want to try it for free? Try this fun position: stand facing each other in the shower. Hug your partner as you wrap your left leg around his waist. He places his right hand under your thigh to keep you steady as he enters you. Meanwhile, his other hand is free to caress your face and run his fingers through your hair. What will your April showers bring you?

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March 14 is Steak and a BJ Day

In a country with hundreds of useless holidays (Talk Like a Pirate Day, anyone?), it's nice to finally see a holiday recognize two things that are so important to the men in this country - beef and blow jobs.

That the two are so utterly intertwined cannot be doubted.  It's like peanut butter and jelly, ham and cheese, or Angelina and Brad.  Steak and blow jobs are to men what wine and chocolate are to women - two things we simply cannot live without!

Americans consume, on average, 100 lbs of red meat a year and we spend over $142 billion annually on meat products.  According to a Finnish study, men eat more red meat than women.  So we know men have a vested interest in steaks.  And obviously, they have the only interest in blow jobs!  Hence a holiday only a man could create!

No one is quite sure of the origins of this holiday, but most sources agree you can blame a radio show host out of  Boston named Tom Birdsey.  You can tell a man created it because the holiday is simple, self-explanatory, requires no special gift or card, and the man gets everything out of it.  From it's small, humble, beginnings around 2002, it has now become a thing, garnering several websites, its own Twitter handle, a Facebook account, t-shirt and sticker promotions, and over 1 million hits on Google.

Never one to miss a holiday, especially one with sex as its basis, Fantasy Gifts NJ has gotten into the action by offering a free BJ Blast on March 14 with every $25.00 purchase!  So come on ladies - you got Valentine's Day - let's give this one to the  guys!  Celebrate Steak and a BJ Day on March 14th - he'll thank you for it!

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Cool off With Hot Sex!

It's hot outside!  It's hot inside!  It's so muggy and disgusting, you don't want anyone to touch you - so what should you do?  Forgo sex until the fall?  Probably not a great idea.  Instead - try these hot weather sex tips!  The only thing that'll heat up will be your sex life!

1.Try sex in the water.  ANY water!  No pool?  No problem?  Go crazy with a little PDA and search out a secluded lake or ocean.  Use your neighbor's pool if they are not home (or be real quiet if they are home)!  Even your bathtub or shower will feel great - especially if you incorporate some water fun toys from Sportsheets Sex in the Shower line!

2.Think cold - ice cold.  Try putting a sex toy in the freezer.  We love the Icicles line from Pipedream Products but any glass sex toy should work.  The ice cold sensation will slowly change with the heat of your body to a red hot experience.

3.Embrace your nudity.  Summer is hot.  Too hot for clothes.  Walk around like a sexy vixen in your panties or, better yet, naked.  You'll be surprised how sexual you'll feel when you are freed from the constraints of your clothes.  Best of all, you're always ready to go!

4.Turn up the heat.  When you sweat, your body produce pheromones, those lovely little smells that tell your partner you're ready to go.  Don't mask those smells, embrace them!

5. Have sex outside.  You can't do this in the winter, so get the benefits of the season and hit the great outdoors.  Have sex in the lake, the ocean, the canoe, anywhere so long as you both are comfortable.  One tip, avoid sand sex.  Although it looked hot in From Here to Eternity, chances are Deborah Kerr was picking sand out of her lady parts for months to come!

6.Cool off with minty oral sex.  There are so many great products on the market - you can try a minty oral lubricant like Doc Johnson's Good Head Gel or some oral sex mints.  We like Go Deep Oral Sex Mints. Either way you'll get a cool, tingly feeling during oral sex.  

7.Don't stop there - cool off during regular sex too!  Some lubricants like Wet Ecstasy Xtra Cooling Lubricant contain a hint of pepperming extract for an amazingly soothing, cooling sensation.

8.Summertime has tons of natural aphrodisiacs in their peak season.  Try fresh oysters on the halfshell, strawberries with champagne, avocado (guacamole and chips?) or asparagus.  

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Benefits of Healthy Sex Life

Did you know a recent study out of Duke University claims we should be having around 200 orgasms a year?  Think about that.  That averages out to an orgasm every 2 days.  Do you know anyone who orgasms every other day?  Who has time for that many orgasms? 

Well, you should.  The health benefits of frequent orgasms are well documented.  Sexual activity can actually bolster your immune system.  When you orgasm, you body produces more immunoglobin A, which is an enzyme that helps you fight off colds, flus and other illnesses.  Frequent sexual activity also increases the flow of blood and other bodily fluids to the genitals.  This blood flow carries fresh oxygen which replenishes antibacterial agents that can also improve your resistance to illness and infections.  Feeling a cold coming on?  Forget the chicken soup and zinc, try sex!

Sexual activity is also a great cardiovascular workout.  Actual intercourse can burn off 144 calories in a half-hour.  You can increase that by adding heavy petting, kissing, and other activities that can make you breathe hot and heavy.  The person on top burns the most calories so if you're looking for a good burn, don't just lie there!

Sex is a great pain reliever.  When you orgasm your body releases oxytocin, a natural opiate with analgesic properties.  If you have a headache, that's exactly when you should be having sex, not avoiding it.

Sex can help you sleep better.  After you orgasm, your blood pressure drops and your body releases natural sedatives that can lead to a deeper, more fulfilling sleep pattern.

Frequent sex will make you look better.  The release of endorphins can improve your complexion by keeping your skin supple.

Sex has even more health benefits.  For him, it may help fight cancer.  A recent study showed that the more frequently he ejaculates, the less likely he is to contract prostate cancer.  For her, frequent sexual activity will help strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, preventing incontinence as she ages.

Whatever the reason - to look better, feel better or to stay healthy, sex is wonderful cure-all.  So start tracking your orgasms and shoot for 5 per week.  Your body (and partner) will thank you!

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Celebrate Oral Sex Month!

June is Oral Sex Month! Celebrate by Doing Down!

June is Oral Sex Month and Fantasy Gifts is celebrating!  What started as a simple little day, June 9, has blossomed into an entire month!  How did June 9 become Oral Sex Day?  Think about it!  It's the ninth day of the sixth month - 6-9, 69 dude!

Whether you're going down on a him or a her, technique is important - otherwise it's just a hot mess!  Let's start with going down on him.  I once had a girlfriend who thought giving a blow job meant just that.  Imagine her date's surprise when she tried to literally tried to bring him to orgasm by just blowing on his penis!  Hopefully she's learned a little since then, like an effective blow job involves more than just the penis.  Men have several sensitive parts down there and they all deserve attention.  The testicles should be stimulated by playing with his balls.  His prostate, or p-spot, is said to be analogous to the women's g-spot.  It can be stimulated manually by using two knuckles to massage his perineum, or you can use a vibrator specifically designed to stimulate his p-spot.  We like Pipedream's Silicone PE vibrator.  It's narrowed, tapered tip makes insertion easy and the ringed handles makes for easy removal.

When performing oral sex, don't forget the lubricant!  Doc Johnson's Good Head Gel is specifically formulated to be used during oral sex.  It provides a tingly, flavored sensation.  Worried about gagging?  Try a product like Comfortably Numb Deep Throat Spray.  It's a flavored desensitizing spray that lightly coats the back of the throat to suppress the gag reflex during oral sex.  One of our favorite new products is the Doc Johnson Helping Head Ultimate BJ Helper.  This is a 2" mini stroker that fits over the shaft of the penis, leaving the most sensitive glands on the head of the penis free for oral stimulation.  The combination is sure to make any man explode!

If the latest news stories involving Michael Douglas have taught us anything, it's that there's no such thing as safe sex.  While you can't get pregnant from oral sex, you can transmit sexual diseases, such as the HP virus. If you're not in a safe, committed relationship, we recommend using a condom during oral sex.  Flavored condoms are available in many flavors to maximize your enjoyment.  

Don't forget to celebrate Oral Sex Month this June!  Stop by a Fantasy Gifts store in New Jersey and receive a free Tongue Dinger tongue vibrator free with any $50.00 purchase.  Next entry: Oral Sex for Her - it's more than just the alphabet!

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Sex After Breast Cancer

Angelina Jolie revealed today that she had made the courageous decision to undergo a preventative double mastectomy.  Jolie wrote an Op-Ed piece for the New York Times that she had made the decision based on genetic testing which revealed she had an 87% greater likelihood of contracting breast cancer and a 50% risk of contracting ovarian cancer.  Jolie, whose mother died of ovarian cancer, stated she had hoped other women would find encouragement from her story.  

Jolie was lucky in several respects.  She was able to afford the approximate $3,000.00 cost to have genetic testing, which is often uncovered by insurance agencies.  She had a loving and supportive partner (who happens to be Brad Pitt, so doubly lucky!).  And she was able to afford reconstructive surgery to her breasts.

One in eight women are likely to be diagnosed with breast cancer.  Prophylactic mastectomy procedures have risen by 50% over the last ten years.  For the thousands of women a year who undergo mastectomies, the procedure comes with significant mental ramifications.  Despite the psychological and cosmetic benefits of having reconstructive surgery, fewer than one in four women undergo the procedure.  Women who are on Medicaid or Medicare, are African-American, and who are treated at rural or non-teaching hospitals are less likely to have reconstructive surgery.  Breast reconstruction not only improves psychological but also sexual well-being.

Whether women opt for breast reconstruction or not, the lingering sexual effects of being a breast cancer survivor can last well after the patient is in remission.  Although survivor's quality of life typically begins to return to normal after one year, sexual difficulties often persist longer.  Chemotherapy

can push younger survivors into premature menopause, causing vaginal dryness and pain.  Vaginal dryness was one of the chief complaints of all breast cancer survivors.  To combat vaginal dryness, Fantasy Gifts recommends Pjur Eros Original Bodyglide.  Made of 100% medical grade silicone, Eros feels silky smooth and never dries out.  It is safe, extremely long-lasting, and produces a velvety-smooth lubrication.


Vaginal pain was another complaint.  Sexual medicine providers recommend vaginal dilators like Dr. Laura Berman's Dilator Set.  Starting at 2.75" circumference and going up to 4.75", the
Dilator Set works for every women.  The vibratory option helps to take the clinical edge off dilator use by making the focus on pleasure as well as training. 

Because many women experience sensory sensitivity after chemotherapy, Fantasy Gifts recommends non-flavored and unscented lubricants and massage oils.  System Jo All in One Sensual Massage Glide is an unscented, silicone-based massage oil.  Its highly concentrated formula can also be used as a personal lubricant.

Of course, the biggest complaint sexual complaint among breast cancer survivors was lack of sexual desire.  Unfortunately, there is no magic pill for that (unless the government finally decides to start funding research for female libido-enhancing drugs - but that's a different blog).  Loss of libido is tied to so many breast cancer issues: body self-esteem, lack of estrogen, pain, vaginal dryness, genital fatigue.  Our best advice is to try some of the above measures, see what works for you and what does not.  If your libido does not increase, have a frank, open discussion with your medical provider.  There is currently a low-dose topical estrogen cream that has met with positive results. 

Angelina Jolie remains one of the sexiest women in the world.  Her sexiness has nothing to do with her breasts - it's her confidence, her inner and outer beauty, and her sexuality.  To all breast cancer survivors, Fantasy Gifts is here to help - and we salute you!

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