Why 50 Shades of Grey?

For those of you who have been living under a rock for the past week, the trailer for the movie 50 Shades of Grey was just released with much fanfare!  Not only was the trailer premiered on the The Today Show, but in just over a week the trailer has garnered over 13 million views on You Tube.  So what is it about this book that has inspired, to quote to the trailer, a "worldwide phenomena?"

To be honest, we're not quite sure.  All due respect to E.L. James, she certainly didn't invent erotic fiction nor did she pen it particularly well.  Erotic fiction has been around since words were invented.  From ancient Greece to William Shakespeare, better writers than E.L. James put their erotic fantasies down on paper and none of them felt the urge to use the term "inner goddess" even once, much less 150 times.

Perhaps it's because E.L. James started with familiar, popular characters and built on them.  For those of you who don't know (because you've been living under that proverbial rock) "50 Shades of Grey" was originally written as a piece of fan fiction based on the popular Twilight Series by Stephenie Meyer.  Of course, those books were hardly great literature either, but they struck a chord with young, female readers who loved the idea of a strong, wealthy, handsome protagonist who saw the beauty in a shy, awkward girl with a serious self-esteem issue.

Whatever the reason, no one predicted the frenzy that would soon surround these books.  Vendors were soon selling out of Ben Wa balls, women were openly reading erotic fiction on the beach and the phrase "mommy porn" was born (or at least took on a completely different meaning!).

At Fantasy Gifts we couldn't be more thrilled that this book has allowed millions of people to shed some of their sexual inhibitions and encouraged them to become more sexually adventurous.  Anything that allows the topic of human sexuality to become more mainstream and openly discussed is a welcome change from the previously held notion that sex is a dirty, taboo subject best left to back alleys and seedy book stores.  Fantasy Gifts has been in business for 35 years and has always strove to make sexual health and wellness not only an acceptable topic, but a necessary topic.  Humans are sexual beings and thank God the mainstream media is finally acknowledging that.  Even the controversy surrounding the book, ("BDSM Advocates Worry About 50 Shades of Grey Sex) means we are finally having more open discussions about what it means to be in a consensual, BDSM relationship versus an abusive relationship.  Was Anastasia Steele a willing sub or was she a victim of domestic violence?  Discuss, discuss, discuss!

Certainly the book has encouraged people to become more adventurous.  No one needs to invest in a Red Room of Pain (how would you hide that from the kids anyhow?) but a little light bondage/restraint can be great fun.  The 50 Shades of Grey Toy Collection has just been released and contains everything from Soft Limits Deluxe Wrist Ties to a Hard Limits Restraint Kit and everything in between.  But more about the collection in another blog.  Between now and the movie's release on Valentine's Day in 2015, we'll fill you in on other items in the collection and products from other vendors that we love that will help you explore that lifestyle portrayed in 50 Shades of Grey.

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Ben Wa 101

Ben Wa Balls have been around since about 500 A.D.  But although they have been a constant staple in adult stores since, well since adult stores were created, it took a little phenomenon known as "Fifty Shades of Grey" to spur sales into the stratosphere.

Ben Wa balls are a very simple concept.  As soon as the cave man invented a wheel, they were probably looking for a way to insert small spherical objects into a woman's vagina.  Not much is really known about their invention but the use of ben wa balls were discovered by Western travelers to the Orient and documented as early as the end of the sixteenth century.

Ben Wa balls are also known as love balls and pleasure balls.  Ben Wa balls were originally meant to provide the man with extra pleasure during intercourse however some creative lover quickly discovered that they had a positive effect on women as well.  The feeling of balls floating freely in the vagina and constantly massaging the vaginal walls caused intense sexual arousal. 

Thanks to modern science, it is now known that Ben Wa balls are excellent at strengthening the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle (a hammock-like bone that stretches from the pubic bone to the coccyx or tail bone, forming the floor of the pelvic cavity and supporting the pelvic organs).  The act of strengthening the PC muscle are commonly called Kegel exercises.  Kegel exercises are recommended for women who recently had childbirth to restore vaginal muscle tone and help strengthen a weak bladder.  It has been proven that the strength of the PC muscles was directly related to the intensity of an orgasm.  Wearing Ben Wa balls for a few hours every day strengthens the vaginal sphincter and many men and women report intense sensations if the woman squeezes her vaginal muscles tightly around her partner's penis during intercourse.

Ben Wa Balls are the best and easiest way to exercise the PC muscles because the vagina is forced to flex in order to hold the balls inside.  Additionally, when the muscles are flexed, blood rushes to that area increasing sexual arousal.  Ben Wa balls are not meant to bring an orgasm, but rather work as a slow tease, keeping the woman in a constant state of arousal.

Using Ben Wa Balls is very simple, but can take some practice.  The size of the Ben Wa balls is very important.  If you have had a vaginal birth or are a larger woman, purchase a larger size of Ben Wa Balls.  This will help to ensure the Ben Wa Balls do not fall out in the grocery store!  Also, determine the material you want your Ben Wa Balls made out of.  There are several different types.  

Pipedream Ben Wa Balls are small and classic.  Made of metal and gold in color, they are only .75" in diameter.

 

 

 

 

Pipedream Icicles No. 41 are perfect for the first-time Ben Wa wearer.  Made of Borosilicate Glass, they are 1" in diameter.The most popular and modern version of the traditional Ben Wa Balls is the Pipedream Classic Duo Tone Balls.  They have a small ball that jiggles independently inside the larger ball, a feeling you will certainly notice!  

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